Lent Day 19: How Lonely Must He Have Been? (John 12:12-15)

Lent Day 19
How Lonely Must He Have Been?
John 12:12-15

12 The next day the great crowd that had come for the festival heard that Jesus was on his way to Jerusalem.
13 They took palm branches and went out to meet him, shouting, "Hosanna!" "Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord!" "Blessed is the king of Israel!"
14 Jesus found a young donkey and sat on it,
15 as it is written: "Do not be afraid, Daughter Zion; see, your king is coming, seated on a donkey’s colt."

◇ Every time I read the scene of Jesus and his disciples entering Jerusalem, I feel a mix of joy and sorrow. When I was very young, it was all joy, but as I've aged, tears have mingled with the happiness. I smile at the sight of the welcoming crowd. It's a smile of joy and fun. How delighted the disciples must have been! They must have been bubbling with laughter, light on their feet, shoulders back, and heads held high, expecting their Teacher to take over Jerusalem, overturn everything, and sit on the throne, imagining their own futures. The people waving palm branches and shouting "Hosanna to the Son of David" must have expected Jesus, who healed the sick and performed the miracle of the five loaves and two fish, to start a revolution and turn the world upside down. They would have shouted "Hosanna" even more fervently.

But when I think of Jesus' heart, I am moved to tears. Seeing Jesus riding a young donkey up to Jerusalem, how lonely must he have been? How afraid must he have been? None of the disciples, the crowd, or anyone knew what was about to happen—how lonely must he have felt? And when I think of the cross that awaited him in just a few days, how terrified must he have been? Jesus knew all too well what it meant to die on the cross, and his heart is deeply conveyed through his prayers in the Garden of Gethsemane.

The disciples were only thinking of themselves. Not one understood Jesus' heart. And the crowd goes without saying. How different are we from the disciples? How different are we from the crowd? Are we not looking at Jesus with only our expectations, our hopes, our desires, and our greed in mind? Are we not following Jesus based on our thoughts rather than his? A week later, what did these disciples and the crowd do to Jesus?

God, help us to see Jesus instead of just looking at ourselves. Turn our self-centered hearts to think of Jesus. Let us stay with you to the very end. Holy Spirit, lead us in truth! Amen.